Sunday, November 21, 2010

Happy 1st Birthday Reagan Abigail!

We had a cupcake themed party for Reagan's 1st birthday. It was so much fun and the girl LOVED her chocolate cupcake. Happy 1st birthday my sweet girl!
































Tuesday, November 16, 2010

One Year Ago Today....

...we left for the hospital as a family of two anxiously awaiting the moment that we would become three...never knowing how greatly our lives would be impacted within the next few hours. One  year ago today, we prayed over my belly and our sweet little girl that we would have a healthy delivery. One year ago today, I was so scared about becoming a mom and not knowing what to do. One year ago today the journey began and our lives were forever changed.
It's been a year coming but here's the birth story for my sweet little Reagan Abigail. I want to remember every detail..good and bad.
Because of complications with high blood pressure, we were scheduled to be induced November 16th, 2009. My actual due date wasn't until December 6th. We spent the day with phones turned off, just enjoying the last few hours of being just the two of us. We realized how unprepared we were and that we only had one newborn sized outfit. So, we made went shopping at Kohl's and bought you several adorable pajamas. (My mom did too). I'm pretty sure I will keep these pajamas forever. It's already surprising to look back at them and how small she was. After shopping, we did some last minute cleaning and packing and then our dear friend, Amy came over to snap a last minute belly shot. We had to be at the hospital by 7:00pm and in the haste of everything, we forgot to eat dinner. So, we drove through Chicken Express and ate in the garage parking lot at the hospital. We were both so nervous, we barely ate anything. Ben prayed over me and the baby and away we went.
I of course got lost and couldn't find where we were supposed to go. I called my sister who just happens to be a labor and delivery nurse at the same hospital to get directions, and she surprised me by being on call. I was so blessed to have her be a part of our delivery. She even took the time to personally select my nurse. Total sister of the year award! I changed into a lovely hospital gown...which is honestly a glorified cheap shower curtain with one tie. My sweet nurse Mary, gave me a pill and hello LABOR! I had contractions throughout the night but wasn't too miserable. Bright and early...5:00am, they started the Pitocin and the contractions really picked up quickly. A few hours later (I don't remember the exact time), my doctor came in and broke my water. Disgusting. Enough said. A short time after she broke my water, I got my epidural. Total nightmare. The anaesthesiologist missed the first time and had to give me a second shot. I felt like my leg was on fire. Awww..the joys of giving birth. Moving on...I'd like to say that the rest of the labor and delivery was peaches 'n cream; however that only lasted a short while. I was able to rest and laugh at the intense contractions that were showing up on the monitor all the while feeling nothing. Then the fun began. The nurse kept having me roll from side to side. I obviously wasn't able to feel the lower half of my body, so picture when they relocate a whale...large crane, several people, a huge basket...okay..maybe it wasn't that bad but close. After rolling around like a flopping fish out of water, I was finally told that Reagan's heart beat was dropping and they were trying to get her to reposition herself by having me turn. They weren't sure if the umbilical chord was wrapped around her or if she was just hanging on. By the way....spoiler alert...she was just hanging on to it. Stinker. Little did I know that actually Reagan was in pretty serious distress and had been showing signs of distress for awhile. My doctor finally came in and broke the news that we would have to do an emergency c-section. The minute she said it, the nurse announced that she had already called the OR. Ben and I just sat there in shock...disbelief..not saying anything. My sister walked in and tried to play down the stress and intensity of the situation by joking that Reagan was giving me a hard time already...and I just lost it. I broke down and sobbed and sobbed. For many reasons I think. I just kept repeating that I just wanted my baby to be okay. I didn't care about me..just her. I think I sobbed because I was terrified of a c-section and what that meant. I'm a planner and this was not on my schedule. We didn't get a chance to see our parents' or tell anyone. Thank goodness again for my sister and her connections. She was able to keep everyone informed.
I remember being wheeled into the OR and them putting the curtain up, so I couldn't see my belly. It was right under my chin. Total nightmare for a claustrophobic person. They said that they were going to do a test cut to see if I could feel anything. I remember them counting out loud all of the tools and doing the same after they stapled me up. I hadn't done any research on c-sections and had no idea what to expect. I remember asking the anesthesiologist how long would this take. How much longer. Apparently I was given too high of a dose of numbing meds, and they went into my shoulders and hindered my breathing. So, they put me on oxygen.

While this is anything but the ideal birthing story, I would do it all over a million times to get the same result...my sweet and precious Reagan Abby.
Tonight as I cuddled with her and put her to bed, this story just kept flooding through my mind. What a day. What a year. What a whirlwind. Challenging? Yes. Exhausting? You have no idea. Worth it? Without a doubt the biggest blessing to ever be bestowed upon me.